Decoding Power Phrases
Sharmila Gautama, Founder of EnglishCoach Services
Meryl Runion, creator of the SpeakStrong method and communication expert, in her book, Power Phrases, writes say what you mean, mean what you say and get what you want. Simply put but loaded with meaning.
What does a power phrase sound like?
It’s a short and concise statement that is straight to the point. Often in moments of anger and frustration we use a lot of words that don’t say what we intend to say. And the same can happen when we are at a loss for words – we end up using a lot of fluff words that don’t have an impact.
A simple short sentence can do the trick that a string of ‘no-words’ cannot achieve.
Instead of a blunt ‘no’, some short phrases that pack power are:
1. Sorry, it’s not a good time.
2. I can do this another time. Not now, please.
3. If this is urgent, I am sorry I am busy right now.
Say what you mean is next.
Be authentic in your communication. This is a catch phrase but holds true for all communication, professional and personal. When the “words come out from the depth of truth”, you speak with sincerity and that goes a long way in building relationships too. When you say something flippantly like, “I don’t like the way you work” versus “Can we try another way of doing this?”, we make a big difference in the way we communicate.
Using negative words when you can phrase it positively will put your listener in a defensive mood and lead to a communication-halt. Instead of saying, “don’t be late”, say “be on time”.
Another sure way to ensure your message is powerful is to stay away from undermining yourself with phrases like, “I am not sure if this is right”, “I wonder if I should do this like this” or “I might have to do this”. These are phrases that show you don’t see yourself as a person of authority.
A powerful expression that opens the door for further communication is, ‘I am sorry’. Accepting you are wrong actually puts you in a strong place in the relationship. Say this without giving any reasons or explanations. Keep it simple.
When we hand over an important task to a team member, we may sometimes not feel very confident and say, “I hope you can handle this”. In such a situation just say, “I trust you”. This powerful phrase puts the onus on the other person to do their best. And you may be surprised that the job is well-done.
Hold your argument well. I like to write down what I would like to say rather than depending on my ability to formulate a good argument. When I write my point of view for a discussion, I have looked at the pros and cons and I know my argument is strong. I speak with belief and clarity.
Provide clarity in instructions. Don’t leave your reports guessing about what to do. Give clear instructions and timelines that help in doing their work well. Consider saying “Please share the reports by tomorrow morning” than saying, “Please share the reports”.
While these are a few strategies to adopt, there are many more that you would have used in your communication that got you the results. Share them with us too.
